Home Feelz ‘Avengers: Infinity War’ Sex Toys Will Penetrate Your… Wallet

‘Avengers: Infinity War’ Sex Toys Will Penetrate Your… Wallet

written by Quinzel Lee May 2, 2018
Censored stamp on Avengers Infinity War poster

If there’s anything I love more than puns, it’s puns with sexual innuendo. Avengers: Infinity War is not exempt from Rule 34 and Geeky Sex Toys is all about making your geek-related sexual fantasies a reality.

***If it isn’t obvious already, I’m gonna go ahead and advise you to proceed with caution. There are lots of sexual puns and NSFW content ahead.***

Avengers: Infinity War is a film that is ten years in the making. The excitement and tension has been building and building for this movie. So don’t you deserve a little… release? *eyebrow wiggle*

With previous pleasure-making product lines such as “Orgasms of the Galaxy” and “Pokemoan”, Geeky Sex Toys know that the one thing geeks need after coming from the movie theater is to… well…

avengers infinity war meme: Big man in a suit of armor. You take that away and what are you? Stark naked.

Guaranteed to continue and intensify the thrills experienced during Avengers: Infinity War, Geeky Sex Toys presents Indulgers: Pleasure Wars.

The line is all inclusive of accommodating each pleasure spot. The selection of dildos include HawkAss Arrow dildo and The Incredible Dong. Captain Anal and Arse Reactor are perfect for those who engage in anal play. Arse Reactor actually has a base that glows in the dark, similar to Iron Man’s arc reactor. Geeky Sex Toys didn’t leave out those who prefer to penetrate over being penetrated. Agent Getsmeoff has a soft, skin-like silicone that includes vibrations that make this toy live up to its name.

For those who engage in fisting, Infinity Fist is also available in this line. According to the website, there is only downside to using the Iron Fist. It “won’t give you omnipotence and omniscience, it will give you one hell of an orgasm though!”

I was a little concerned about the intended placement of “Moan-lnir” because while I’m all for even the kinkiest of kinks, I wasn’t sure that a large, rectangular hammer and any open cavity could safely mix. No worries, though. About 30 seconds later, I realized it was the handle that is intended for insertion.

 

I feel like since they had the Infinity Fist, the sex toys weren’t limited to the current roster of Avengers. I kind of wanted them to have a Black Panther sex toy. However, I imagine there may not be a way to make one without it being racist as hell, so I can appreciate that they avoided that.

These pleasurable companions have been hyped up for a while. A post on the Geeky Sex Toys Instagram page shows a photo shoot of the toys with the caption: “Final shoot for the team before they are ready to be released in 24 hours. Hope you are all as excited as we are?!”

So, any of you naughty geeks wanna give these toys the good ol’ college try? Let us know your thoughts and whether you wanna try it or not, in the comments!


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